The Impact of Tot Shabbat

In 2018, I defended a doctoral dissertation called Exploring Tot Shabbat: A Study on Tot Shabbat Programs and Their Effect on the Engagement in Jewish Life of Families with Young Children. It was the first formal study of the phenomenon. I want to translate the findings out of academic English so the people who lead Tot Shabbat, fund Tot Shabbat, and bring their kiddos to Tot Shabbat can use them (I’m trying really hard to resist my ADHD urge to info dump, there is SO much more I want to tell you, hopefully this will whet your appetite).

Over the course of a year, I listened to 113 families who attended Tot Shabbat programs at synagogues, JCCs, and early childhood centers across 24 states, and to the 146 leaders who designed those programs. These are the three findings worth quoting at your next board meeting (and I hope interesting enough to make you want to learn more!). They come from the 2018 study, and everything I have seen across a career of leading and observing these rooms has only confirmed them.

Families Love Tot Shabbat, and It Builds Relationships

More than 90% of participating families agreed or strongly agreed that Tot Shabbat gives their family a positive Jewish experience, connects them to Jewish community, encourages them to participate in Jewish life, and helps them build relationships with other members. More than 75% said it teaches their family, connects them to Jewish prayer, and influences the way they engage with Judaism. And 89% reported that Tot Shabbat had influenced them to take up at least one Jewish practice outside the program.

When I looked at what mattered most, the answer was relationships. The single most consequential thing a Tot Shabbat does is connect families to one another and to the people who lead their community. That is worth naming plainly: this is good work, and families feel it. The honest other half of the finding is that loving the experience is one thing, and reaching its full potential is another. The rest of the data shows where the room to grow is.

Tot Shabbat Is a Membership Engine

76% of the families at a typical Tot Shabbat are already members of the synagogue that hosts it, and another 12% say they plan to join. That is nearly nine in ten families either committed to membership or moving toward it. 90% of participating families take part in other events at that synagogue, and 41% credit Tot Shabbat with encouraging them to do so.

If your board thinks of Tot Shabbat as a children’s add-on, this is the slide to put in front of them. It is one of the most effective membership and engagement pipelines the synagogue runs, and it is doing that work quietly, every week, while everyone calls it the cute program down the hall.

The Leaders Feel Under-Equipped, and They Know It

When ordained leaders were asked whether their training had prepared them to lead Tot Shabbat, 65% said no. Across the board, leaders named a desire for more training and support, and the programs they described often reflected an insufficient grounding in how young children, and the adults with them, develop.

The leaders are doing demanding, often under-supported work. The field has been running one of its highest-leverage programs on instinct and goodwill, without giving the people who lead it the developmental tools the work requires.

What This Means for Your Community

Families value Tot Shabbat, and it quietly drives membership and engagement. It has earned its place in your budget. The data proves the program works; the biggest opportunity now is to equip the people who lead it.

Fund the training. Treat the role as the professional, developmentally grounded work it is. The communities that do will keep their families and deepen what those families experience, turning a beloved program into the formative one it is built to be. You can read more about the research behind Tot Shabbat here.