10 Books Every Songleader Should Read
I am a voracious learner, though these days my reading mostly happens through my headphones. I consume audiobooks constantly, and what I love most is when a book gives me the language and the research for something I already learned through experience. There is nothing like finding the evidence behind a practice I have trusted for twenty-five years, and being able to name it, teach it, and share why it works. These ten books have done exactly that for me, shaping how I think about child development, family engagement, and the sacred work of making music with kiddos. 11/10 recommend.
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1) Scientist in the Crib
Focus: This book explores the powerful, scientific ways young children interpret the world, much like miniature scientists. The authors examine children’s cognitive development, highlighting the importance of play, curiosity, and exploration in learning. If you want a preview of Dr. Gopnik’s brilliance, watch her TED talk, What Do Babies Think.
Why it is relevant: These insights empower Tot Shabbat leaders to design programs that align with children’s natural developmental stages. Presenting yourself as a person who studies children helps parents understand how you prioritize their babies, and fosters a session that feels engaging and purposeful.
Babies and young children are not only profoundly engaged in trying to make sense of the world around them, they are also profoundly engaged in trying to make sense of the people around them.Buy on Amazon
2) Good Inside
Focus: Dr. Kennedy’s approach centers on compassionate parenting, where children’s challenging behaviors are seen as opportunities for growth rather than problems to fix. She has been called the Millennial Parent Whisperer, so your audience may well be familiar with her. I am an enormous fan of her podcast of the same name.
Why it is relevant: For our work, this approach encourages leaders to create inclusive environments where each child is supported and seen as inherently good. It has reshaped how I guide songleaders working with kiddos.
We can’t change our children unless we also work on changing ourselves. And, when we do, they’re more likely to meet us where we are.
I wrote a song called Good Inside that puts Dr. Becky’s idea to music:
Buy on Amazon
3) The Spiritual Child
Focus: This book reframes our programs as more than a fun family gathering. They become a sacred opportunity for nurturing spiritual growth in children and their families. Miller emphasizes that spirituality is a critical aspect of development, providing tools for resilience and well-being. I also recommend her follow-up, The Awakened Brain.
Why it is relevant: By sharing these ideas with families, congregations can highlight the invaluable role of sacred community in fostering emotional and spiritual health. I dig into this further in my post on music as a tool for spiritual development.
Children are born with a natural spirituality and a sense of the sacred. If we embrace it, we can give our children an essential source of well-being, wisdom, and wholeness.Buy on Amazon
4) The Amen Effect
Focus: This book investigates how communal spiritual practices, such as shared affirmations like saying Amen, bring people closer together, creating stronger connections and a sense of unity. Brous discusses how shared rituals build a collective sense of faith and purpose.
Why it is relevant: Our gatherings can be powerful communal experiences by incorporating interactive rituals that foster connection. Inspired by The Amen Effect, leaders can design services where families feel uplifted and included in a shared spiritual journey.
A simple Amen binds a congregation in faith, affirming both the individual and collective voice.Buy on Amazon
5) Songleading: A Work of Art
Focus: Rosalie Will distills a remarkable career of leading group singing into a practical, generous guide. Chapters like Know Your People, Know Your Space, and Know How to Lead cover the craft from the inside, with quick-reference tools for learning a song and even songleading outdoors.
Why it is relevant: I have had the opportunity to learn and sing with Cantor Will on many occasions, and her passion and expertise are big and beautiful. This book names the skills we often pick up by osmosis and makes them teachable: she explains how to read a room, hold a space, and lead with intention rather than performance. If you lead Jewish music for families, Rosalie’s wisdom will sharpen what you already do and give you language for it.
Buy on Amazon
6) The Art of Gathering
Focus: Priya Parker explores the principles of hosting meaningful gatherings and what makes an event impactful and memorable. She advocates for intentionality in everything from the invite list to the setting and structure, treating gathering as an art form.
Why it is relevant: This book encourages leaders to approach each session with purpose, so every gathering feels welcoming and significant. She highlights the critical role of identifying a clear purpose for your gathering.
The role of the host is to set the tone and create an atmosphere of trust and openness.Buy on Amazon
7) Families and Faith
Focus: Bengtson’s long-term study reveals how faith and religious identity are sustained across generations, highlighting the role of family dynamics, traditions, and parental influence.
Why it is relevant: This research underscores the value of family-centered programs in cultivating enduring Jewish identity. Bengtson highlights the need to intentionally connect generations, so invite folks of all ages.
Despite enormous changes in American society, a child is actually more likely to remain within the fold than leave it.Buy on Amazon
8) Let There Be Play
Focus: Jonathan Shmidt Chapman, founder of the K’ilu Company, turns the cycle of Torah stories into dramatic play, art, and multi-sensory experience for young children. The book walks from Genesis through Deuteronomy with conversation starters and hands-on activities built for ages 4 to 7. I have had the opportunity to see his brilliance firsthand, and if you are seeking to engage and educate kids and their families, he needs to be on your radar.
Why it is relevant: This is play as a pathway into Torah, which is exactly the move our work is built on. Chapman gives songleaders and educators a full year of developmentally appropriate ways to let kiddos enter the story with their whole bodies, not only their ears.
See Jonathan bring this to life in this workshop:
Buy on Amazon
9) This Is Your Brain on Music
Focus: Levitin explores the profound connection between music and the human brain, examining how music influences our emotions, memories, and cognitive development, and its role in social bonding.
Why it is relevant: Understanding the neurological impact of music can deepen program effectiveness. By harnessing music’s power, sessions become deeply resonant, evoking joy and a sense of togetherness.
Music is the language of memory. It contains all the emotions we’ve felt, all the scenes we’ve lived.Buy on Amazon
10) The Singing Neanderthals
Focus: This book traces the evolutionary origins of music and language, arguing that music played a crucial role in human social bonding and communication long before language fully developed.
Why it is relevant: This book highlights the social power of music. By engaging families in shared musical experiences, leaders tap into an ancient mechanism that strengthens community and supports emotional expression.
Music may be the activity that prepared our pre-human ancestors for speech communication and for the very cognitive, representational flexibility necessary to become humans.Buy on Amazon
Want the system that turns these ideas into practice?
These books give you the why. Inside the Songleading for Kiddos Support Squad, we build the how: curriculum, coaching, and community for the people who lead Jewish music for kiddos.
See how the Support Squad works